Drowning

Don't make me beg you to talk to me. I can't take another moment of this silence... My heart is aching for your voice. This isn't what I'm use to. I'm use to talking to you every day about anything we can think of and now what? Now I attempt to talk and all you do is turn a blind eye. You don't even know I'm talking about you because I could be talking about anyone I know really. No one really attempts to talk to me besides Alex, even though I reach out to you all. I feel alone in a crowded room again, I feel like I'm drowning in a sea of unwanted thoughts and past memories. My angel is the only one who cares enough about me, no one else does. So thank you, thank you for showing me what great friends I have. Friends that care, and friends that don't lie. And I hope you're not too ignorant to think I meant those last two sentences. Once again, thanks.

Pushed away feelings

Sometimes silence is the worst option. Talking can open doors, get you friends back, help you understand why people do things.Angel of Innocence, i understand your anger but it is not by my hand that you have been hurt. The King is the one you shall take your anger out on, not the one he is now talking to. My Fallen Angel is the one who has allowed me to speak to him, because he trusts me. Not even the Dark Princess, who hates him far more than you, does not show the anger you do. So maybe i did know it would make you mad. Why do you talk to me still? Maybe i knew you still held feelings for him. Why don't you tell him? Why come to me with those melancholy eyes when you're the one who stopped talking to him? Granted, he might have ignored you, but no one has time for your petty crap anymore. I know i don't. I know for a fact you will never read this because we don't talk much anymore and i wouldn't tell you i have a blog anyways, but if one day you stumble across this, just know that i don't feel bad at all. I deserve his friendship, you don't and neither does the Dark Princess. My angel trust me and loves me enough to know i would tell him of any wrong doings your ex would do towards me. Farewell Angel of Innocence, i guess we both win.

Deadly friends

What is the cause for your lack of sleep child? Is it because you finally realized you've bashed everyone you once trusted, because your thoughts are centered around your past, or is it because you feel yourself coming part at the seams? Do you crave that numbness that the prince and princess once coveted, that game of ghouls and goblins? That game of Russian roulette is dangerous, for if you play with demons you will never win. They will control the outcome of the game and trust me, they will not feel sorry when you are staring at your own blood. Do you miss the ones who you bashed? They probably will never see how much you cared for they Are too caught up in their own affairs to notice the blood dripping from every knife in your back. Angel of Innocence, Dark Princess, I hope you read this because its for you especially. How many times was I suppose to stand by while you took the knife from my back just to stab me again? How many times was I suppose to back up your lies with some made up truth from your heads? How many god damn times was I suppose to love you while you played me?! That's not friendship and its not what I want. All I wanted was friends and you can't even manage to do that right. Well I hope when the time comes, and you have to choose between yourselves and the girl crying with your knives in her hands, that you see her and realize I mean a little more than you think I do. And even if its too late, ill die with a smile on my face knowing you finally realized all I wanted was friends to lean on.